A Letter From Munich
I have made it back to Germany with the few dollars I got back from the tax department. I tried to get away from the frustration of not getting a job and not having a home in Australia and most of all no perspective for a better future. I was living in a van for close to 3 years and since there was no change to my situation I decided to try again from scratch in Germany. I am still not sure whether that was a good decision. The reverse cultural shock hit both of us, M and me badly. The country and its people seem to having gone backwards. They feel ice-cold, racial and without heart. An endless list of regulations and human robots obeying and enforcing them without any common sense. Most people live a life of abundance since a long time and do not make an attempt to understand any other life circumstances, how it feels and what struggle it is to survive without a place to stay and without work. Empty people without experience of hardship.
I got a room in a women’s shelter for 8 weeks, but my daughter is not allowed anywhere with her dog and that means we are basically both homeless. M got a job at the airport and I take care of the dog while she is at work. She sleeps in a shelter, which is a blank container with no bed. She is lucky enough to have the container by herself most of the time as there are hardly any homeless women with dog. Everyone recommends to abandon the animal, which would mean her death as she does not eat or drink without M. M would feel the same on her side. Life would not make sense to her without her soul mate. In America the dog was recognized as an emotional support dog, but here nobody cares about such a certificate.
I can’t believe how backwards Germany is in many regards and I feel ashamed for my origin and citizenship. This country is where I was born and raised.It was a good country, but is now run (down!) by corrupt politicians and corporates. I strongly doubt that it will ever again become something like a home. The destiny of many emigrants.
There is plenty of work and it looks like I have a much better chance to find a job, but there is no housing due to the disproportional amount of refugees. We have no advantage of being nationals, we are treated like unwanted foreigners. As long as I have no place it is most unlikely to get accepted on a job and finding accommodation with a dog seems to be impossible. Nowhere else to go without money. Munich feels like a black hole, a trap.
We need a miracle to change our situation. I don’t know anymore what to do and both M, I and the dog are running out of energy.